Awakening Atheist

Losing interest in everything,
Even from the Manmade gods.
Knowing that I’m unable to meet the expectations of the so called societal, material norms.
Baffled by the thought of acceptance by the people for the way my soul grows.

Didn’t i try to be like the perfect example you gave me?
Yes, I did not.
You’ve given me chiliad examples but I’m unable to find myself in those roles.
Or I might say, you haven’t seen the other side yet, haven’t experience the timing of awakening lores.

I might not be able to reach your expectations but I know I am on my way to reach the absolute control.
You made me believe in your religious words but I finally found the soil of my soul.
You call me an atheist but I see that you are not even sure of your own existence questioning others how to seek mental pleasure a little more.
Is this where your god lives, your mind?
In your thoughts?
Or in your societal norms?
Did you find him?
Don’t you pray him to please everyday?
Did he changed his mind?
Is your soul happy?

Growing through pain, pain is the only way to seek pleasure.
Trapped by the mind, the concept of soul which I never wore.
Losing strength by the body, thought my mind is the only crowned hore.
Finally walking in the path of alignment, the destiny of the soul,
which your blind eyes call it a God but you never even tried to find the door.

– Suditee Devi